How to Share News of an Unintended Pregnancy

Avail NYC exists to be a safe haven for women and men facing an unexpected pregnancy or seeking support after an abortion. We are not a medical provider.

Facing an unexpected pregnancy can bring up a range of emotions. It’s natural to feel a mix of reactions, and you might not know how to process everything all at once. 

Sharing the news with those closest to you can feel daunting, filled with anxiety and uncertainty. Here are some steps to help you navigate these conversations with confidence and care.

Spend Time with Your Own Emotions First

Before sharing the news, give yourself time to reflect. 

Allow yourself the space and the grace to experience the many emotions you’re experiencing. This life change is big, and brings physical, emotional, and mental changes with it. Yet, taking time to process your feelings will help you approach others with clarity.

Consider journaling as a way to explore your emotions. Writing down your thoughts can provide insight into what you’re feeling and help you better give voice to your needs when you’re ready to share.

Consider Who You Want to Tell

Think about the people in your life who are your biggest supporters. 

On a piece of paper, make a list of people you trust most. Think of those who have stood by you during difficult times. Next to their names, write down how they have supported you in the past and how you might need their help now.

Remember, the people you choose to share this with will have their own reactions and emotions to process. They may need time to respond and their initial reaction may not be their long-term perspective, so patience and understanding are key.

If you’re unsure of where to begin, think about starting with someone who has always been a good listener or who has shown compassion in challenging moments. 

If you feel as if you don’t know who to tell or don’t want to share with your network, talk with an advocate at Avail NYC. Advocates are trained to provide a listening ear and compassionate support. They can help you process your feelings, consider your options, and prepare for conversations with others. You don’t have to navigate this journey alone. Having someone to talk to can make all the difference.

When you're ready to talk, choose a time and place where you can have a private, distraction-free conversation.

Begin by sharing how you feel, and let them know how they can support you. If you’re unsure of what to say, practicing in advance or writing down key points can help you feel more confident.

Try framing the conversation with phrases like, “I’m sharing this because I value your support” or “I want to talk about something important, and I’d like your help.” Setting a positive and open tone can encourage a constructive response.

It’s natural to feel overwhelmed or nervous. Whether your thoughts are racing or you feel like a pendulum swinging between emotions, remember that these feelings are common.

Be patient with your own emotions. Pausing to take a deep breath can help ground you and bring focus to your next steps.

In moments of heightened anxiety, practice your favorite mindfulness technique. Paying attention to your breathing–even for a few moments–can help calm your mind and steady your emotions.

Offer Yourself Grace

When going through any big life event, it’s important to show yourself kindness throughout the process. Remind yourself that your journey is unique, and you are doing the best you can.



Think about the fear or negative emotion that holds you most. Then, think about a truth that combats that and write it down. For example, if you’re struggling with uncertainty, you could write, “I am strong and capable.” Put this note somewhere you’ll see it often to remind yourself of this truth. 

Support is Available

At Avail NYC, we understand how challenging this journey can be. Our personal advocates are here to provide a safe, confidential space to talk through your experiences and questions. 

If you’re unsure about how to share the news or navigate this season, we’re here to help. Schedule your free appointment today to connect with a personal advocate who will walk alongside you as you find clarity and confidence in your next steps.

Avail NYC exists to be a safe haven for women and men facing an unexpected pregnancy or seeking support after an abortion. We are not a medical provider.