Why Slowing Down Can Actually Change Everything

Avail NYC exists to be a safe haven for women and men facing an unexpected pregnancy or seeking support after an abortion. We are not a medical provider.

When faced with an unexpected pregnancy, your mind may be racing with thoughts. Pressure—whether from yourself or others—can make it feel like you have to decide immediately. But in reality, slowing down is one of the most important things you can do. It gives you space to process emotions, gather information, and make a choice that truly aligns with what you want.

In moments of uncertainty, pausing can feel completely counterintuitive. But making a decision while feeling rushed or overwhelmed can lead to second-guessing or unresolved feelings later. By taking intentional time to reflect, you allow yourself to gain clarity and confidence in the path you choose.

How Stress Affects Decision-Making

When you are under stress, your brain reacts instinctively. It enters fight-or-flight mode, designed to help you respond quickly to perceived danger. In these moments, your brain’s fear center, the amygdala, takes control. This can make you feel anxious, restless, or unable to think clearly.

Research shows that stress-based decisions are often more impulsive and emotionally driven. The brain has two primary decision-making systems. The first is fast, instinctual, and emotional, which is helpful in immediate danger but not ideal for complex choices. The second system is slower and more logical, allowing for deeper reflection. When people feel pressure to decide quickly, they are more likely to react emotionally rather than think through their options.

Why Slowing Down Leads to Better Choices

Slowing down helps shift your brain from reacting to reflecting. When you pause, the logical part of your brain, the prefrontal cortex, has time to engage. This allows you to see your options more clearly, weigh the long-term impact of your choice, and make a decision that aligns with what you truly want.

Taking even a short pause can reduce stress, improve confidence, and prevent regret. Rushed choices often lead to second-guessing because they do not fully incorporate personal values or long-term implications. By giving yourself time to breathe and process, you create space for clarity, calm, and confidence in your decision.

The Pressure to Decide Quickly

If you’ve only recently found out you’re pregnant, you may feel an intense urgency to make a decision right away. 

Sometimes that urgency comes from external pressures: a partner’s opinion, family expectations, or even cultural messages about what you “should” do. Other times, the pressure comes from within, driven by the desire to regain a sense of control or wanting to revert to what life was like before the pregnancy.



Wanting to move past discomfort quickly is completely natural, but avoiding emotions doesn’t bring lasting relief. Instead of pushing through the decision in survival mode, consider what it would feel like to slow down. What questions would you ask yourself? What clarity might emerge if you gave yourself just a little more time and space?

The Permission to Pause

Slowing down does not mean delaying indefinitely. It means creating intentional time to process, gather information, and move forward with confidence.

If possible, consider:

• Taking a personal day or setting aside quiet moments in your routine.
• Spending time alone in a peaceful space, away from distractions.
• Journaling your thoughts to process them in a more structured way.
• Talking with an advocate or trusted friend who can provide support.
• Scheduling a medical appointment to gather necessary information.

When you intentionally create space to process, you give yourself the opportunity to hear your own voice clearly. Looking back, you will want to know that you made a decision that truly aligned with what you wanted, not one shaped by pressure or fear.

The Body and Mind Connection

When emotions feel overwhelming, sitting still can be difficult. Moving your body can help regulate your nervous system, making it easier to transition from feeling reactive to feeling grounded in your choices.

Consider trying one of these grounding activities:

• Take a walk outside and focus on the sights, sounds, and feel of your surroundings.
• Stretch or practice deep breathing to release tension in your body.
• Exercise or practice self-care to release stress.
• Listen to music and allow yourself to fully engage in the rhythm and melody.

Movement connects your mind and body, helping you shift from feeling stuck in uncertainty to feeling more in control. As your nervous system settles, your thoughts may become more organized, and your emotions may feel less overwhelming.

The Power in Pausing

Giving yourself space to slow down doesn’t mean you’re indecisive or avoiding reality. It means you are honoring yourself by processing your emotions and taking the time you deserve to make a choice that aligns with your values.

This decision is not just about the next few weeks or months. Think about your future and what truly matters to you. Taking time to pause allows you to see your options fully and consider the situation from all angles. It gives you the space to ask, "What do I truly want?” rather than “What do I feel pressured to do?”

The more intentional you are in this process, the more confident you will feel moving forward. You are worth the time it takes to make a decision that reflects who you are and what you value.

Avail: The Place to Find Support

You don’t have to navigate this decision alone. Having a supportive, judgment-free space to talk through your emotions can make all the difference.

Avail NYC proudly offers a safe place where you can process your thoughts, gain clarity, and explore your options without pressure. Our trained advocates are here to listen, support you, and walk with you as you consider your next steps.

Taking time to slow down is a gift you give yourself. It’s a way to honor your emotions, recognize your needs, and ensure that you’re making a decision you feel confident about. No matter where you are on this journey, we’re here for you.



Avail NYC exists to be a safe haven for women and men facing an unexpected pregnancy or seeking support after an abortion. We are not a medical provider.

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