Making a Decision? Let Your Values Lead the Way

Avail NYC exists to be a safe haven for women and men facing an unexpected pregnancy or seeking support after an abortion. We are not a medical provider.

Throughout life, we often find ourselves at crossroads, facing decisions that could significantly change our path forward. If you find yourself facing an unexpected pregnancy, you know that it could qualify as one of these big choices. During these times, the many outside pressures and inner turmoil can cloud our judgment, making it difficult to see the way forward.

This is where the power of value-based decision-making shines the brightest. It provides clarity that can act as a light in the darkness. When we prioritize our own values, we can make sure that the choices we make fit with our core beliefs and long-term goals.

What is Value-Based Decision Making?

In short, value-based decision making is the process of making choices that line up with your beliefs and goals so that your decisions reflect what’s most meaningful to you.

It's a process that respects our individuality, acknowledging that each person's values are as unique as their fingerprint. These values, whether they center on family, integrity, compassion, or personal growth, serve as a guidepost for making decisions that feel right on a fundamental level.

Does it Really Work?

According to psychologists and decision-making experts, aligning decisions with our values leads to more fulfilling outcomes and less regret. These benefits stem from  choices that are a reflection of who we are, and ensure that our decisions aren’t based on a moment’s emotions or external pressures. 

In their workbook, Dr. Barbara Markway–a clinical psychologist–and Celia Ampel write, “Values are the principles that give our lives meaning and allow us to persevere through adversity.” They show us that your values can act as your compass, especially when your best next steps aren’t always clear. 

Identifying Your Core Values

The first step in value-based decision making is identifying your core beliefs and values. This reflective process involves peeling back the layers of societal expectations, pressures you feel from friends and family, and personal experiences to uncover what truly matters to you. 

To determine your values, think back to the times in your life when you've felt the most fulfilled, proud, or at peace. What were you doing? Who were you with? What values were being honored in those moments? Take a look at this list and ask yourself the following questions:

• What accomplishments or acts in my life have made me feel fulfilled? Why?
• When life’s been hard, what principles do I refuse to compromise?
• When do I feel the most connected and true to myself?
• What values do I admire most about my close friends and family?
  

Prioritizing What’s Most Important

After making your list of values, the next step is prioritization. It's natural to feel that many values are important to you, but figuring out which beliefs are most important to you helps clarify which values are truly non-negotiable. Try making a list of your top 10 in order of what’s most valuable to you. If you feel stuck between two, ask yourself: If I had to choose, which one would I lean towards more?



This doesn’t mean that values that are lower on the list are less important. It just helps you better understand yourself and which of your values play the biggest roles when you make decisions. 

The Role of Values in Facing Unexpected Pregnancy

In moments like facing an unexpected pregnancy, your values can help cut through the confusion and offer a clear direction based on what truly matters to you. By grounding your decision in your values, you create a foundation of inner peace and certainty, regardless of the external noise.

Overcoming External Pressures and Doubts

Sometimes the noise we hear on the outside is from voices we recognize, and other times it’s a felt pressure from a bigger system. External pressures can come from anywhere or anyone, including society, family, coworkers, friends, or even our doctors and nurses. Even our inner critic can introduce doubts and pressures that can sway us from making a decision we can be confident in.

The key is to recognize these influences for what they are: external inputs and fears that should not outweigh your own values and beliefs. When you listen to your own voice and stay true to what’s important to you, you’ll move forward knowing your next steps are right for you.

The Role of Support Systems

When navigating life’s difficult decisions, support systems of friends, family, or organizations like Avail NYC, play a crucial role. Instead of another voice that adds pressure and uncertainty, they offer understanding, compassion, and validation. Avail’s Personal Advocates are experts in walking with you through your journey and helping you explore your values, options, and how they might align.

You’re Not Alone

If you're standing at a crossroads facing an unexpected pregnancy, remember, you're not alone. Avail exists to support you, offering guidance and resources that honor your values and choices. We are committed to helping you find and center on your voice, and take next steps that feel right for you. Reach out today to explore how we can empower you to make the best decision for you. 

Avail NYC exists to be a safe haven for women and men facing an unexpected pregnancy or seeking support after an abortion. We are not a medical provider.

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